{"id":105,"date":"2010-12-07T09:58:00","date_gmt":"2010-12-07T09:58:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/2010\/12\/07\/few-jokes-about-slovenian-state-administration\/"},"modified":"2010-12-07T09:58:00","modified_gmt":"2010-12-07T09:58:00","slug":"few-jokes-about-slovenian-state-administration","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/2010\/12\/07\/few-jokes-about-slovenian-state-administration\/","title":{"rendered":"Few jokes about slovenian state administration"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Only in slovenian language (sorry):<\/p>\n<p>21. MAREC<br \/>\n&#8220;A ve\u0161, kateri datum je za dr\u017eavne uradnike najpomembnej\u0161i?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;???&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;21. marec, prvi spomladanski dan: takrat je namre\u010d konec<br \/>\nzimskega spanja in za\u010detek spomladanske utrujenosti&#8230;&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>BREZ PLESA<br \/>\n&#8220;Zakaj uradniki ne znajo plesati?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Ker \u0161e ne obstaja glasbena skupina, ki bi znala igrati tako po\u010dasi.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>URADNI\u0160KA O\u010cALA<br \/>\n&#8220;Zakaj imajo uradniki o\u010dala?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Da se pri tem, ko zaspijo za mizo, ne pi\u010dijo s svin\u010dnikom v oko.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>RUBE\u017d<br \/>\nSodni rube\u017enik je pri\u0161el h kmetu, da mu zarubi bika. Kmet ga je<br \/>\nvpra\u0161al: &#8220;Ali lahko \u0161e enkrat nasko\u010di kravo, preden ga odpeljete?&#8221;<br \/>\nRube\u017enik, dobra du\u0161a, je to dovolil. Toda bik je odpovedal na celi<br \/>\nfronti in ni\u010d ni pomagalo, da bi nasko\u010dil kravo.<br \/>\n&#8220;Tipi\u010dno!&#8221; je ugotovil kmet. &#8220;Niti eno uro ni v dr\u017eavni slu\u017ebi, pa je<br \/>\n\u017ee len in utrujen!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>NEMOGO\u010cE<br \/>\nUradnica je povedala \u0161efu, da je zanosila med slu\u017ebo. Ta je razmislil,<br \/>\nnato pa dejal:<br \/>\n&#8220;To je nemogo\u010de! Prvi\u010d: nh\u010de ni z ljubeznijo pri delu, drugi\u010d: pri nas<br \/>\n\u0161e nikoli ni nih\u010de ustvaril nekaj, kar je imelo glave in noge, in tretji\u010d:<br \/>\npri nas \u0161e nikoli ni nih\u010de naredil ne\u010desa v devetih mesecih, ampak je<br \/>\nza to potreboval ve\u010d \u010dasa!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>TRIATLON<br \/>\n&#8220;Ali ve\u0161 v katerih disciplinah tekmujejo uradniki v triatlonu?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Prepogniti, preluknjati in vlo\u017eiti!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>BREZPOSELNI IN URADNIKI<br \/>\n&#8220;Kak\u0161na je razlika med brezposelnimi in uradniki?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Brezposelni so neko\u010d \u017ee delali.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>SRE\u010cANJE<br \/>\nUradnika se sre\u010data na hodniku ministrstva. Pa eden vpra\u0161a drugega:<br \/>\n&#8220;Kaj ti tudi ne more\u0161 spati?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>NADURE<br \/>\nUradnik, ki je ve\u010dino svojega delovnega \u010dasa prespal v pisarni, se<br \/>\nnenadoma zbudi, pogleda na uro in vzklikne:<br \/>\n&#8220;Oh, danes sem delal pa eno uro dalj, kot je potrebno!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>PRELO\u017dEN<br \/>\n&#8220;Kako re\u010dejo, ko pokopljejo uradnika?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Samo prelo\u017eili so ga!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>MIKADO<br \/>\n&#8220;Kako se uradniki igrajo svojo igro -uradni\u0161ki mikado?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Kdor se prvi premakne, izgubi.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>PO\u010cIVANJE<br \/>\nNekatere pisarne v dr\u017eavni upravi so kot grobovi. Na vratih bi lahko<br \/>\npisalo: &#8220;Tu po\u010diva ta in ta.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>PRIPRAVLJEN<br \/>\nMislim, da se Jure pripravlja na dopust!&#8221; je uradnik Miha rekel<br \/>\nsvojemu kolegu.<br \/>\n&#8220;Po \u010dem to sklepa\u0161?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Kar poglej ga, kako nemirno spi za pisalno mizo!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>DELITEV DELA<br \/>\n\u0160efica glavne pisarne le\u017ei v bolni\u0161nici. Obi\u0161\u010de jo kolegica Hilda.<br \/>\nBolnica jo zaskrbljeno vpra\u0161a: &#8220;Je v slu\u017ebi vse v redu?&#8221;<br \/>\n&#8220;Seveda! Tvoje delo smo si razdelile. Petra kuha kavo, Barbara \u0161trika<br \/>\npulover, ki si ga ti za\u010dela, Mojca re\u0161uje kri\u017eanke, jaz pa spim s \u0161efom.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>ODPRTO<br \/>\n&#8220;V dav\u010dnem uradu je na vratih napis: &#8220;Odprto &#8211; prosimo za razumevanje.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>NAJKRAJ\u0160I URADNI\u0160KI VIC<br \/>\n&#8220;Uradnik gre na delo&#8230;&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Only in slovenian language (sorry): 21. MAREC &#8220;A ve\u0161, kateri datum je za dr\u017eavne uradnike najpomembnej\u0161i?&#8221; &#8220;???&#8221; &#8220;21. marec, prvi spomladanski dan: takrat je namre\u010d konec zimskega spanja [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-105","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/105","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=105"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/105\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=105"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=105"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/d-mashina.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=105"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}